not feeling too good about much of anything

I've got a major race in two weekends and that is all I can think about. My health is depressed and I've got a race on the 26th. I'm working my ass off and I've got a race on the 26th. I'm just sick enough I can't run continuously and have been walking more and more and I've got a race on the 26th. My long run yesterday ...I completely misjudged so much and cut it from 12 miles to 5 and I've got a 13.1 mile run on the 26th. I've got an IV in my arm and it's still going to be there when I run on the 26th!

I don't know what to do. This always seems to happen. Just as training is working; just as it seems like my lungs and legs are ready to do a major distance, disaster strikes. I will admit that I probably could have held out 'til after the half-marathon to go on antibiotics, but I suspect this is the better option. Arrest my decline early (hopefully) and perhaps gain enough breathing room (literally) to have a good run. My legs can take it, no doubt; oh, they'll be sore enough after the race - they haven't gotten the real consistent training needed to just shrug off 13.1 miles - but they won't crap out on me.

I really misjudged things Sunday. I waited too long to go out, it was too hot and I didn't realize it because the humidity was down. I had a dizzy period and was crystalizing salt on my skin inside of four miles - hence the aborted distance.

The things I do for my lungs.

This round of IVs is off to a portentious start. For one thing, the nurse that came, though a familiar face, was not prepared to place a mid-line, so I'm sitting here with a peripheral running three HOURS worth of medications into my veins. The peripheral will get replaced tomorrow night with a midline by another nurse. *sigh*

My meds are cefepime, tobramycin, and vancomycin. You may remember - I think I wrote about it on this blog - that vanco causes me an allergic reaction; something I didn't remember until the vanco was running in and all of a sudden, I feel like I've got a cold and I itch everywhere. I've taken two Benadryl, but that's like trying to put out a camp fire with a water pistol.

Of course, even with overlapping my other therapies (Vest and inhalation treatments), the IVs will add approximately an extra hour in the morning and two hours in the evening to my routine. I have no idea where that time's going to come from. How am I going to get eight hours of sleep? Well, iPhone to the rescue; maybe I'll just set a 1-hour timer so I can go to bed and wake up to change medications and go back to sleep, or something.

I'm sorry. This blog isn't really helpful or informative. Certainly, no one's getting any information out of it and I'm not exactly chronicaling my running with Swiss watch accurancy. It's not helpful as a CF blog, either. In fact, I'm really not sure why I bother to keep up after it at all. Maybe it's time for blogfade.